Archive for June, 2010

Friends, friends, friends…
June 20, 2010

“Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down”

Even until the end of high school, I still walk away from groups of classmates. I do realize that this is the final moment; that after this I might not have the chance to see them again. And it’s not like I don’t want to experience the fun. At times I do get a little bit jealous when I see pictures of friends hanging together in a cafe or restaurant, and I do want to know what happened during the gathering. Everytime I see those pictures, my first thought will be “Can I someday be like that?” You know. The socialite. The popular. Surrounded by friends. Laughing over someone and make fun of them (not negatively). But a further thought quickly follows: do I really want to be like that?

Umm, no thanks.

I’m not saying that having friends by your side is bad or not fun at all, but I know those people’s characters. They’re like the North while I’m the South (again, not the right-or-wrong comparison). The fact that I’m not sitting among them is because I don’t want to. It’s written in the list of things I’m not fond of, together with some other things that might be included in such events as well.

My thoughts will almost always end with the realization, hey, I have my own friends. The melancholy side in me causes me to wait for someone to ring first rather than ringing him/her beforehand, which explains why I don’t exist in many social events, but I will be there when they ring me, and so will they. And the fact that they sincerely accept me as I am makes me content. I’ve met more people that couldn’t receive my past, but these people have proved that it’s not a big deal for them. I’m happy for what they do, and though I never said it on their face, my thankfulness and gratefulness for them is beyond any measure in the world.

“A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are”